Sunday, 5 July 2015

A Clean-Up Spree

Not a mote, not a speck
Dares stand before her 
A whoosh and a sweep
And the dust bunnies run for cover

Let me introduce you to the neatness nazi, the cleanliness freak, the stain-hater of the family...she is the one who has given a whole new meaning to the term 'spotless'. In her school classroom, she wields the duster on the blackboard. At home, she wields it on the filth. She will scrub and re-scrub even when the cleaning lady has done her job and left.

My mother has a thing against untidy things. It irks her real bad, so much so that I think she is probably on the verge of being an ablutomaniac. But Providence has sent me to Earth to countervail her tendencies.

Mom sometimes calls me a tramp in her rage. Like when she finds my bed sheet stretched up far back to reveal the mattress beneath. Or when my laptop and I canoodle in bed right before I shut down for the night (while the laptop stays on till it loses all its charge and shuts down in its own time). Or when I decorate my bed with foodstuffs of all kinds and refuse to remove the packet of unfinished biscuits and the bottle of water from it. These and many more such instances justify her sobriquet for me 'cause according to her, I behave like a hobo in my own home, stacking everything on the bed and treating my room and the rest of the house like a street. And so right before my cousins were to visit us after a really long time, mom charged into my room and warned me to clear up my space and get things in order.
"I am sick of doing your room.” she began in her don’t-you-dare-mess-with-me voice. “They are coming tomorrow. You better get this hole of yours to look decent. Like a part of the rest of the house."
I know when it's a harmless warning and I know when it's an order. It was the latter this time. I could tell by her tone. So I did the only thing people of my generation are capable of. And swift came Dr. Google to the rescue. I came across these 10 pointers on how to do a quick job of making one’s place look clean. I said ‘look’ because I only meant for it to 'look' presentable. I wasn’t about to actually clean! Duh!

I know it's nothing to brag about but I did clean out each shelf myself. Phew!

As I looked at the pretty picture on the webpage and scrolled down the article, things began to seem quite simple and not so arduous a task as I might have been led to believe by my fears.

Gave my Aristotle and Plato (my dear goldfishes) some food for thought!

And so I began. I decided to clear the bed and dust out my bed sheet. But looking at the food stains and the crumpled state of the poor sheet, I decided to just chuck it in the laundry basket and get a new one instead. When I got my bed a nice new red-white-black sheet, my eyes fell on the crumbs and bits lying about on the floor. They looked out of place with the immaculate bed now. And so I got a broom to just sweep them into a corner. Just a superficial sweep, you see. Then as I started keeping the articles back into their respective places, I found some of the places caked with dust. I thought it wouldn’t hurt to clear the area a bit. A little wipe here and a little sponge there. By and by, I went from nook to cranny and ended up covering the entire room, cleaning out corners and unearthing clumps of hair, tissue papers, half broken pencils, old rubber bands and suchlike.
So, you see what the article was all about? Instead of a few quick cleaning tips, it was a recipe for spring cleaning. Suave !

I so felt like jumping right onto the bed 
and messing it all up again 

Mom came home from the market, carrying a huge bag of vegetables and fruits. She entered my room and doubled back. 
“Did elves visit the tramp?” she deadpanned. I rolled my eyes.

Frankly, though, I was surprised at my own efforts. I had done a pretty good job of tidying up. My den looked like other rooms now, even better perhaps!

I am participating in the Ready For Rewards’ activity for Rewardme in association with BlogAdda.

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